I hope you guys have been enjoying our Keys to Connect series! It’s definitely been a great reminder to me to make sure I am making time to connect with my family. This week, the kids and I had an opportunity to get away with my husband for a few days on a trip he was taking for work. It was nice to get out of the house, away from working on our AirBnB, and just be able to focus on the family. We have been in a very busy season, so being able to take some time to show the kids they are important to us and that family time is important was crucial during this time.
If you are just joining us, make sure you check out Communication, Openness, and Practicing New Habits until they Become Natural. We are going letter by letter in the C.O.N.N.E.C.T. series, and today is E for Encouragement. I’m so glad you’re here and hope you stay a while.
Our homes need to be places where we constantly build each other up. Out in the world, we can easily hear how we are doing things wrong. This is especially important for spouses that work full time. If your spouse has a stressful job or work environment, the last thing he or she needs is more criticism at home.
Here is a helpful hint: the more you encourage your spouse and kids, the more you will find yourself encouraged as well. You’ll be surprised to see how encouraging words become the native language in your home after practicing this over time.
Always look for the good in those you have relationships with and speak it out loud. Don’t just assume that they know they are doing a good job. Kids thrive on their parents’ praise. This is really big too when it comes to love languages. If your spouse or child’s love language is words of affirmation, encouragement is going to be a real key in connecting with them and filling up their love tank. Sharing an encouraging word can be as fulfilling as spending hours watching a movie together, spending money on gifts, or even cooking an elaborate meal for them. When you have limited time and resources, you want to make sure that what you are doing is making the biggest impact it can. I talk more about Love Languages here if you’d like to know more: How to Make Your Kids Feel Loved – Like A Boss.
Here is a excerpt from The Power of Encouragement that I thought fitting to share here:
“I’m going to be really honest here. Early in my marriage I was what you might call a “nagging wife” from time to time. I would say, “Take the garbage out, do this, do that” and would get really annoyed when my husband wouldn’t do the things that I asked him to do a hundred times! You know how when you tell someone a hundred times to do something it really makes them want to do it? I know if there’s something that I intend to do, like I already planned to do the thing, as soon as someone tells me to do it, I literally want nothing to do with it. Even though I had that understanding myself, somehow I thought the more times I told Justin to do something, clearly, the more he would want to do it… bahaha. Enter my lesson on encouragement.
I learned that the more I encouraged my husband and told him all the reasons I was thankful for him, how handsome he is, and how much I appreciated all of his hard work, the more things began to change. I’m not making this up. I tell Justin how handsome, hot, and ridiculously good looking he is literally 50 times a day. I let him know that I genuinely appreciate all the things that he does for our family. It builds him up and lets him know how much I love him. Now, don’t take this the wrong way – this is not “tell your spouse what he or she wants to hear so you get what you want”. This is an opportunity to open your heart and let him or her know how you really feel. Don’t just assume she or he knows. When your spouse feels loved and appreciated, it will make them want to bring their best self to the relationship.”
Definitely check out the post for more. As you can see, encouragement is an important theme in my life.
I cannot emphasize the importance of encouragement enough! I challenge you today to search for the gold in the ones you love and call it out! Let your voice be the one in their head as they go out into the world and share what they have learned at home – to encourage others they come in contact with. If there’s ever a time in our world where encouragement is needed, it is now.
Let me know your favorite way to encourage those you love!